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Seth's Adventures in Scotland

Ok, so I'm off in Scotland doing grad school. I must be having some sort of adventures, right?

Bizarre Scottish foods I've tried:

deep fried pizza
Hold a small toppingless pizza by its heel and immerse it in the river Hot Grease. It's good, but didn't taste different enough from a normal pizza to warrant the years taken off my life.
tuna on a pizza
This was really weird, until I realized it was a tuna melt. Actually, no, it was still weird.
deep fried Mars bar (UK Mars Bar == US Milky Way)
This sounds completely disgusting, but it's heaven in mouth. Got Milk?
Jumbo deep fried haggis (with chips)
Got Lung? It was ok. Kind of grainy. Not really that interesting.
Roast turkey with traditional trimmings
Guess what the traditional trimmings are? Sausage! Several people told me that it's not uncommon for the sausage to be wrapped in bacon, but I missed that particular freakshow.
veggie haggis on baked potato
smoked salmon pizza
YUM! (Jeff begged for just one more slice)
banana flavoured milk
Ian would love this. It's not really banana flavored, it's banana flavor flavored. It's really gross. I was told I hadn't truly lived before sampling this vile nectar.
Pretzel sticks with bits of embedded marmite.